Subject: Of Cows & Car Dealers

THE PURCHASE

A rancher had been "taken" several times by the local car dealer.
One day, the car dealer informed the rancher that he was coming
over to purchase a cow.  The rancher, seeing his chance to get
even, fastened the following "sticker" to the cow before the
car dealer arrived.


1992 Deluxe Cow - Standard Features and Options Price List:

BASIC COW ----------------------------------------- $499.95
Shipping and handling -----------------------------  $35.75
Extra Stomach -------------------------------------  $79.25
Two Tone Exterior --------------------------------- $142.10
Produce Storage Compartment ----------------------- $126.50
Heavy Duty Straw Chopper -------------------------- $189.60
Four Spigot/High Output Drain System -------------- $149.20
Automatic Fly Swatter -----------------------------  $88.50
Genuine Cowhide Upholstery ------------------------ $179.90
Deluxe Dual Horns ---------------------------------  $59.25
Automatic Fertilizer Attachment ------------------- $339.40
4 X 4 Traction Drive Assembly --------------------- $884.16
Pre-delivery Wash and Comb ------------------------  $69.80

                Farmer's Suggested List Price:     $2843.36
                Additional Dealer Adjustments:      $300.00
   Total Delivered Price (including options)       $3143.36

EPA Mileage Rating 5 miles/haybale without calf.
                   2 miles/haybale with calf.

The above mileage ratings are estimates based on 1990 figures
provided to the EPA by the Bush Administration and may differ
significantly from the actual mileage obtained by the above cow.